Sit on the front steps (in nice weather) and whittle. Use a rubber pocket knife "'cause Mom won't let me to use a real one 'cause I might cut myself."

Find a rubber spoon and use it when you eat with the family. Don't explain.

When you look at your watch sigh and ask "Why must they make things to complicated these days?" This is also good for getting a glass of water, putting on a coat or jacket, putting on a hat, and so on.

When your kids come to visit, have your bed made upside-down (i.e., sheets on top). If they ask tell them that one night your bedroom turned inside out.

WARNING: don't do all of these at the same time.