As a life long "Telegraph" reader I am not surprised at this article but I would ask readers not to take it at all seriously. It is simply a "coming of age" for young scribblers they have on the staff to demonstrate their journalistic style and determine whether their future lies with that publication. They are asked to prepare a piece on some subject, it could be the science of composting, turning left when entering airliners, dealing with rowdy neighbours, anything at all. The depth of research and investigation is disregarded but the article is judged on construction and grammar. Every now and then we are obliged to put up with such tosh in the interests on future journalism!!