Poor WAV! We disappoint you yet again.

Several years ago, i was in a duo and we did this gig at the end of year party of a pigeon fanciers club.

So in the interval I was sat there all bored - for the general talk in the room was of pigeons - a subject i cared little about.

This guy sidles up to me, and commences telling me how much he's in love with his pigeons, how much he paid for them, how he feeds them their favourite food, and when he goes to see them every morning in their little shed - they greet him like a true friend, having about the same level of intelligence (as I was thinking).

I mentioned my encounter to my playing partner - who said - don't you be fooled, i've seen him shoot his little pigeon pals off the roof with an air rifle rather than wait for them to come down - just so he could clock in a better time.

I think football is a bit like that. I would shoot someone off the roof, to see Birmingham City in the cup final.

Pigeon fancying, football, folksinging....its a dirty business, not really for fine sensibilities such as your own. Its called human nature.

have you considered Pure Philosophy?