The lyrics were printed in a book called Proverbs: A Handbook by Wolfgang Mieder (Westport, CT: Greenwood Press, 2004), page 230ff.


THE GRASS IS ALWAYS GREENER (IN THE OTHER FELLOW'S YARD)
Words, Raymond B. Egan (1890-1952), Music, Richard A. Whiting (1891-1938).
New York: Jerome H. Remick & Co., 1924.

1. "Why do you wash your windows?" said Mrs. Haggerty,
"So I can watch the neighbors," said Mrs. Hennessey,
They have a new piano. She has a hat I like;
Lots better things than I have, so I took it up with Mike.
The language that he used might seem amiss.
Translated from profane it goes like this:

CHORUS: Sure the grass is always greener in the other fellow's yard,
And the little row you have to hoe seems mighty hard.

2. You loved our little roadster till O'Day's got their sedan,
And now you call our roadster just an old tomato can.
I can see where Pat is lucky as I look across the fence,
And as like as not he thinks I've got more luck than sense.
If we all could wear green glasses, then it wouldn't be so hard
Just to see how green the grass is in our own back yard.

3. You always see the fine clothes Maggie's hangin' on her back,
And never see the mortgage that is hangin' on their shack.
Mike is buying fancy bonnets just to decorate her dome,
But he hasn't got a single drop of rye at home.
Get the home brew and some glasses, then it wouldn't be so hard
Just to see how green the grass is in our own back yard.

4. Maggie and Mike are married; that may be why they fight.
They dearly love to battle; they're at it day and night.
He's always praising some girl who married someone else.
Surely a lot of trouble started with their wedding bells,
But there's one comeback that she loves to spring,
And he shuts up each time she starts to sing:

5. You're mighty fond of Pat's wife just because she isn't yours,
And I thought Pat was handsome till I found that he snores.
While you love to knock my cooking and to praise each girl you see,
Does it dawn on you there's husbands who rave over me?
If you'd only wear green glasses, then it wouldn't be so hard
Just to see how green the grass is in our own back yard.

6. You criticize my dresses 'cause I made each one I've worn.
If I wore what you bought me, I could shock September Morn.
When you stagger home some evening and you don't know who I am,
And you start to sing that you are king of old Siam,
After I remove your glasses, explanations won't be hard,
And you'll see how green the grass is in your own back yard.