" Every version presents the same account, so there is no need for anyone to "decide" between them."

Kent...you present only versions written AFTER the basic account was agreed on. Emperor Constantine needed a 'standard' version to support his own decision to convert to Christianity about 300AD. He ordered and financed a group of scholars, and The Council of Nicea helped codify the various doctrines. By The Council of Trent, it was largely settled.

But...parts of the basic story have a much longer history, including parts of The Epic of Gilgamesh and continuing thru various cultural groups in the Middle East for over 1500 years. Scribes collected fragments to build on, and **selected** the parts that 'sounded best'...and some no doubt 'filled in' what seemed not to be complete.

Try reading a mostly neutral, independent analysis at http://www.bidstrup.com/bible.htm before just declaring that 'they're all the same'.