I took Mum out to a big grocery store and walked with her for an hour.

I whistled for my buddy Blackie the crow by times for an hour and when he finally flew in I fed him and his lame mate pizza crusts (she can't fly south and he stays here for the winter with her).

I visited an elderly man who recently had a severe health problem recently and I told him a dozen ribald jokes and had him in stitches.

I forgave The New England Patriots coaching staff for calling a bad game and fucking up their whole season by being such idiotic assholes.

Okay, I lied about the last one.