Skarpi,I cannot pretend to imagine your grief, even though I've had my own this year, everyone's grief is profound. Please take comfort in knowing we hope and pray for you and yours, and that justice, be it ours or God's, will prevail. Please also seek professional assistance with your troubles, it really does help.
There are people here who genuinely care. Come back if you want to talk some more. It will do us all good.
Peace, Mooh.