Absolutely ridiculous to bring someone to book for asking for a black coffee. How preposterous! We were also told as teachers at one point NOT to say 'blackboard' but 'chalkboard'. We said a great deal to that, most of which was unprintable. It only makes people even more angry to try to control their every utterance and monitor their vocabulary. I feel that what offends is the deliberate and spiteful aim to hurt and insult. THAT is what should if possible be addressed. I have had a pupil come to me moaning that they were being called 'Ginger' by their mates. I asked what colour their hair was. 'Ginger, Miss'. 'Then what's your problem?' But if a child was being spitefully teased and/or bullied, I'd always intervene. The children knew the difference, and as adults, so should we.