Dear Susan and the Fiddler,

It's hard isn't it? I was raised by a clergyman and his wife, my parents, who were connected in love, life and Dad's calling. I'm not sure sometimes if they could have raised 5 kids to adulthood in any other way than they did. The church was an indispensible element of the equation of my upbringing. I saw first hand the profound results of the various stresses my folks endured, and I know I was affected too. I think I'm the better for it, for the hurt has passed and only the good remains.

Dad conducted the funerals of his own parents some 40 years apart, and that of his first child at its birth. I can't imagine what that did to him and my mother, but they survived and somehow were the better for surviving it together. The hurt has passed, and only the good remains.

Two months ago my Mum (she likes it spelt that way) called me to say that Dad had passed away in his sleep beside her that morning. There was no unfinished business between them, except for years they won't have to enjoy together. The hurt will pass, we know that by experience, and only the good will remain.

This weekend I will likely participate in the disposition of my Dad's ashes. It will hurt, and I'm not looking forward to it, even though I suppose it means some kind of closure for me, but I know it will pass and only the good will remain.

It is somehow trite to say that the current stress will pass, because it doesn't make it pass any more quickly. However, after the fact, there will a time of rest because God dictates it. What you learn, feel, and share will be the good you take from it all. The hurt will pass and only the good will remain.

Please know that you are not alone in prayer. Please also know that there is a Thanksgiving for all things. Just as everything has a cost, a hurt I suppose, everthing has something for which to be thankful. My hopes and prayers are with you both.

Peace, Mooh.