That photo's been altered drastically with the intentions of minimizin' my importance and damagin' me politically. First off, I was wearin' a bathin' suit. Second, they either airbrushed my face to make me look really ugly or they photoshopped some other chimp's face onto my torso. Third, that ain't my torso, anyways, cos it's been shrunk by about 40% from my real dimensions. It looks more like this lunkhead chimp who useta work as a soda jerk in west Chicago. I ain't seen him in years, but it sure looks like him. I bet he has sold out to the Republicans or the Democrats and is tryin' to destroy my candidacy for a bit of the filthy lucre or some free drinks.
As for Renata, she looks the way she should in that photo, so at least they had some couth when it came to the lady.
Whatta buncha bums! The guy from Weekly World News is the worst. I should've made him eat his damn camera...a piece at a time...after I had busted it over his head.