Well, from the 'heights' of Hove, we're gonna take a little trip to a local spot here in Texas that just happens to have the same name . . .

Uncle Charlie's Big Night Out
(Tune: Sweet Betsy From Pike)

Well, back in East Texas we got us a place,
Called the Pussycat Club, where you don't show your face,
Go in with dark glasses, white cane and a dog,
And for twenties and fifties, they'll put on the hog.

Uncle Charlie turned 90, and was in quite a snit,
His eyes had grown dim, he'd slowed down quite a bit,
We all decided to give him a treat,
A trip with his hands that just couldn't be beat.

There was Candy from Tyler, who smelled oh so sweet,
And curved from her earlobes to her shapely feet,
Once Charlie had visited her every corner,
He grinned ear-to-ear just like ole Jack Horner.

Then Kelly from Kilgore thrust her big ones in,
Candy fell over Charlie, which caused such a din,
Well, Uncle he grabbed at both sides with each hand,
And from the looks in their eyes, there'd be no reprimand.

Nan from Nacogdoches brought in Lil from Longview,
These frisky fillies always did things in twos,
On both sides they jiggled and got Charlie upright,
He no longer regretted the loss of his sight!

Well, Belle was the girl who ended the fuss,
She danced up to Charlie, and grasping his truss,
Said, 'Come home with me, darlin', I've got your gold ticket,'
'I'm the girl of your dreams from deep in the Big Thicket.'

The last time we saw Charlie, he was in Big Belle's arms,
Content, he lay back in the expanse of her charms,
She bent down and whispered, and tugged his goatee,
And he answered, laughing, 'Of course I can see!'