Okay, I figgered it's time I helped you humans rise up out of yer ignorance so's you can evolve to a higher level, learn how to act proper, and make somethin' decent outta yer lives.

I am gonna share the fruits of my wisdom and my long experience with you, startin' today. I will drop a few pearls of advice each day as to how you bozos can better yer lives...maybe even advance to the level of an ape or a monkey.

Ya ready? Okay. Here's the first pearl I am droppin'. Listen closely.

An interpersonal communication problem can always be solved by a carefully balanced combination of verbal persuasion and violence.

Write that down, okay? Then meditate on it.

- Chongo