A friend and I in college came up with the following dreadful bit, on the way home from a church service in which several "old faithful" hymns were badly rendered.

(To the tune of "What a Friend we have in Jesus")

What a friend we have in Cheez-whiz, all our crackers to adorn / Oh, what taste we often forfeit, spreadin' Cheez-whiz on our corn...

To be sung as "twangily" as possible... I've blanked out on the rest, which may be the result of divine intervention. Do with this what you will: add, subtract, divide, or conquer.

gabh spòrs,

--Cuilionn