And the ashes, I presume, are presented to the village maidens, as they have been since time immemorial.

Indeed, Eliza, and even to this day it still worries them a bit. The old superstitions (or were they?) still persevere behind the satellite dishes in some parts of Old Blighty. I must say I envy your asparagus orchestra - it's strictly root vegetables in these parts. Asparagus is considered a little 'past the bucket'.

Streams of consciousness? Pah. Rivulets of ridiculousness to that.