b) When the divorce papers were served his wife was in the recovery room, having just had breast cancer surgery.

d) Ordering a bunch of new C-130s the Defense Dept. didn't want OR need, but the plant WAS in his home district.

d) Being the most inept PhD in American History since...well....

d) Having more twists than a snake caught in a corkscrew to help him avoid the draft. His record is bested only by Karl Rove.