And here's a somewhat more modern version:

PAT GETS ON AN AIRPLANE
(Jerry Praver)

1. In twenty hundred and forty one
My trip to Houston had just begun
I went through hell before I was done
To get upon an airplane

cho:

Pat me on my derriere
Touch me almost everywhere
Take a picture of me bare
To get upon an airplane

2. In twenty hundred and forty two
I bade my family a sad adieu
I got into the security queue
To get upon an airplane

3. In twenty hundred and forty three
They studied my anatomy
I gave up all my dignity
To get upon an airplane

4. In twenty hundred and forty four
My private parts they did explore
They fondled my posterior
To get upon an airplane

5. In twenty hundred and forty five
I thought myself more dead than alive
But still I thought I might survive
To get upon an airplane

6. It's Pat do this and Pat do that
Take off your shoes take off your hat
Remove your belt and your cravat
To get upon an airplane

7. In twenty hundred and forty seven
I wished that I was up in heaven
If they checked one place they checked eleven
To get upon an airplane

8.In twenty hundred and forty eight
I thought we were going to copulate
Until I told him that I was straight
To get upon an airplane

Bev and Jerry