The shadowy figure figure outside Bobert's house was none other than Anne Coulter. Many many times she had exposed the real and imagined foibles of "liberals" but being a member of WIGS (Women In Good Standing) she had sworn an oath to protect the ultimate secret of human females, The Women Code. Had this unassuming man of music, recently moved to Gods own State (albeit the least Godly part in the Middle between the majestic mountains and the glorious coast) actually solved the mystery of the ages? If he had, he would have to die!

Coulter fingered her BEAN (Bearing Energy Activated Noose) and waited for him to go inside then dove into the recycling like a hungry raccoon onto a thick verdant bush covered with full plump muscadine grapes.

She found a clue. A picture of a fish jumping out of a banjo.