My old man JVK loved this but always sang


Mary Ellen as the bride turned up
Her Ma turned up and her Pa turned up
FAT auntie Gert and her rich Uncle Bert
And the Parson in a long white shirt turned up
But no bridegroom with the ring turned up
But a telegraph boy with his nose turned up
With a telegram that said the he didn't want to wed
And they found him in the river with his nose turned up.