I'm tellin' y'all that you need to get over it cuz like I said, Columbus can't be changing the name! I mean they've been bitten on that stationery thing before and it ain't good! Do you know the story?

Somewhere back in the mid 20th Century Columbus got the idea that they needed a higher cultural profile so as time went along various artsy-fartsy crap started enjoying a growth that was pretty remarkable. Some yuppie genius figured we needed even more. The City commisioned an artist who had graduated from Ohio State to do a sculpture which we could proudly display next to the one of old Chris which had been a gift from our sister city, Genoa, Italy. Time passes and the great unveiling is due.

Columbus had ordered new stationery products, bought new badges for the fire and police, had new decals made for the car doors, they'd gone the whole route so this new sculpture representing the town would be prominently displayed. On the great day all of this would go into use and pride would know no end. The day arrives and we are all treated to this 25 foot psychodelic turd. The citizenry viewed their new "image" and after some initial silence there was a mass of voices which rang out across the entire city saying, "What the fuck?????"

This funky thing is titled "Brushstrokes in Flight" but most had better names for it. It was moved all over town but absolutely no one wanted it anywhere close.....NIMBY at work. Finally the "flight" part came to mind and as the airport would have no choice it was sent there to scare the hell out of people on incoming flights from cities where culture actually exists. There was one final attempt to rid the state of BiF.

Like I said, even if old Chris was just another dago, Columbus celebrates its Italian heritage as and that statue from Genoa overlooks a riverfront festival where a replica of the Santa Maria is in display............yeah, they built one of them too. In the mid 80's when much of this was going on the mayor was a guy named Dana "Buck" Rinehart. As a mayor Buck was a pretty much of a broke dick jadrool. He did virtually nothing all day and went out drinking with his cronies at night. One night the Columbus Police pulled him over as he'd been swerving down the road. Obviously drunk as a skunk he told the Officer, "I'm not drunk, I'm just inspecting the city."

Buck needed to charge up his image and in the hopes of satisfying the local voters while possibly gaining national attention, he made a magnanimous offer to the city of Genoa (remember Genoa?) to repay them for the statue of Chris.   He and a group of citizens would go to Genoa and donate "Brushstrokes in Flight" to our sister city. Now I don't really know if this is true but I think the city of Genoa is a lovely Italian city and when they saw a picture of BiF, they too said "What the fuck???" However it was, they said thanks, bt NO THANKS!!!

So fly in here and enjoy(?) the sculpture. Over the years the badges have been replaced and the stationery used but let me assure you, Columbus will not be going there again.



Spaw