But you can only judge someone by their past...and here are a few things from Chongo's:

1. Sold his mother and sister into a life of sexual slavery
2. Has consistently lied about his "native-born American" status, even when the facts have been made evident to him and everyone
3. Doesn't know a straight-blowback from a delayed-blowback weapon
4. Totally ignorant of diplomacy, as evidenced by his violent past
5. Entered the US disguised as a bunch of bananas
6. Wears a trilby and not a fedora
7. Usually is behind in paying his just debts
8. Constantly drinks to excess, impairing what little judgement he has
9. Has to use his feet to count above ten
10. Cannot pass a simple history test without cheating
11. See number 9.