The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #140992   Message #3242759
Posted By: Janie
21-Oct-11 - 08:08 PM
Thread Name: BS: Dancing & Possessiveness
Subject: RE: BS: Dancing & Possessiveness
Good for you for at least questioning yourself.

You have the right to ask for whatever you want. Other people have the right to say sure, to deny your request, or even to be put off by it.

Better to be honest early in the courtship "dance." Might not faze the other at all. They may be a person who mistakes jealousy for passion and for whom a jealous lover assuages their own unhealthy insecurity about themselves. Or they may be quite put-off and see it as a red flag.   Better you both find this out early on, rather than either one of you be blindsided later, after you are more emotionally entangled.

You also might consider taking personal responsibility for your jealousy and what it may signal that you could benefit from working through, either on your own or with some professional help. It appears to make you at least somewhat uncomfortable or I think you wouldn't be posting. Emotions are not right or wrong, good or bad. They are non-specific signals or information about ourselves and/or our situations. Ask yourself what your awareness of jealousy is signalling.

Best of luck to you.