"The Rules Of Chocolate"

* If you've got melted chocolate all over your
hands, you're eating it too slowly.

* Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange
slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as
many as you want.

* The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate
home from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it
in the parking lot.

* Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal.
It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat
less.

* A nice box of chocolates can provide your total
daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?

* If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in
the freezer.

* But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's
wrong with you?

* If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on
top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights,
and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect
themselves.

* If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and
white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't
they actually counteract each other?

* Money talks. Chocolate sings.

* Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives
make you look younger.

* Q. Why is there no such organization as
Chocoholics Anonymous?
A. Because no one wants to quit.

* If not for chocolate, there would be no need for
control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry
would be devastated.

* Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things
to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing
done.