This is Colonel-General Field Marshal Gloriana Hapsburg-Battenburg-Tudor, VC, MOH, DSC, CCG, LOH, CdG, DFC, CVC, and all the rest of that.

Sergeant-Major! You WILL come to attention!

Now, you piece of poof. You are a disgrace to whatever regiment of sods you belong to!! You obviously do not know Tradition nor do you respect anything except your own pomposity.

You WILL NOW drop and give me 125 one-handed pushups. If you like, I will race you to completion. Do it NOW!

Very good. Some nice jerks always start the day off right, don't you think?

Sergeant-Major. You will listen to me. This thread WILL continue. It is Tradition. It is threads such as this that made the Empire and now holds the entire Free World together as a family. YOU have no authority over this thread or any other thread. Do you understand me, maggot???

You have nearly lost those stripes you wear. One more slip and you will.

Dismiss!