I am just getting my daughter involved in this. She loves it and she is 6 and off to her first feis next month. There are clear rules on dress and no make up for the younger ones. However, as she gets older I will also try to abide to our own aesthetic while hopefully not doing anything that will result in negative attention.

No wigs. I find the wigs totally unappealing. Her natural hair is plenty curly. A nice curly updo can work. Minimal make up. And certainly no tan. Attractive but not mortgage payment worthy dress. My mom sews so perhaps home made dresses can be one way around this financial part. I think that later teens can make their own decisions if they can also participate in funding some of these embellishments.