Following up on my own request, I did find it under Youtube as part of the 'Aldershot Brass Band", and it's amazingly short for something I actually remember: 5 lines.

RC: I don't half fancy a drink meself
RB: They should put beer on the National Elf
RC: You'd see a diff-er-ent show tonight.
The band would get pissed on Mozart and Liszt...
RB: You're prob-ably right!

(hyphenation added to fit with metre/emphasis/tune)