I collected a version of this in Norfolk about 1975. The lyrics closely follow those written by Adge Cutler of Yetties fame, so I guess most of the song was filched from him. In Norfolk Threshing is 'Troshin' and the song was entitled: 'My Vertical Piston-Drive Troshin' Machine'.

Here yew ar then, bor:

Away down in Sheringham a young mawther did dwell,
Who loved engineering and steam-power as well.
With a college degree and uncommonly keen,
To examine the works of me troshin' machine.

Chorus after each verse.
Troshin' machine, troshin' machine,
A vertical piston-drive troshin' machine.

She told us that she wor a much travelled gel,
Been places, seen faces orl over the worl,
But there was just one thing she hint never seen,
Tha's a vertical piston-drive troshin' machine.

I said if yew loikes yew can come to me barn,
A quick look inside won't do us no harm.
And there it stood shinin' all gleamin' and clean.
Now tha's what I call a real troshin' machine.

She stood there amazed and her eyes opened wide.
So I said, "If yew're good, I might give 'ee a ride.
For there ain't no contraption tha's driven by steam,
Can compare with the loikes of me troshin' machine.

When she asked I to show her just how the thing worked,
I let out the clutch, the machine went beserk.
You could see bugger all for the smoke and the steam,
As I started a-revving my troshing machine.

When her asked could she drive it for better or worse,
The whole damn contraption went into reverse.
The crankshaft seized up, well yew kno' what i mean.
And that wor the end of me troshin' machine.



Collected by Black Jake Two-Fingers.