The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #59418 Message #3312268
Posted By: Amos
23-Feb-12 - 03:22 PM
Thread Name: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
SO he squinted his eyes and he held his breath
And he let his arms go limp
And he waved his hands and invoked the name
Of Chongo, the dreamscape Chimp!
And a cloud of smoke rose up from the ground
SOur and thick and fat,
ANd curdy soon Chongo was standing there
Wearing shoes, and a pork-pie hat.
Wal Gnu was game, and the Chimp the same
With a mean and simian look,
He flapped his ears, and Gnu just sneered,
ANd Chongo answered, "Oook!"
It mighta turned bad, for that flea-bit lad,
We wuz miles from the nearest cop,
And the was feeling awful mad,
When a silv'ry voice said "Stop!!"
Then into the ring stepped Stilly Sage
With an attitude learned from Mother,
ANd a bucket of beer hanging from one hand
And a mess of poems in the other.
And she said with aplomb, "No child of Mom
Ever spills the blood of another!
You are each her kin, and 'twould be a sin
TO mess with the flesh of a brother!"
Now this gave Gnu pause, 'cuz he honored law,
And wanted to do whut wuz right;
But the jungle brat would have none of that,
Fer he'd set his mind on a fight.
But Stilly was calm, with the strength of Mom
"Here's a drink to persuade you", she said.
And with never a fear, she just empited that beer
All over that dumb chimp's head!
Well, old Chongo howled, and cursed and whirled,
And he gave her the Evil Eye,
And "Look what you've done, you wicked girl!"
"I'm melting!", he did cry.
And 'twas truth to say, he was melting away
Turned to smoke, from toes to ear.
Drifting off through the air, leaving Hawkster there
In a stinking puddele of beer.
Well, the folks there just kinda wandered away
Having seen more than they could stand.
And Stilly stepped over to the dripping Hawk
And pulled him up by the hand.
And the only one who was less than pleased
Was the Bookman, Rapparree,
'Cause they made him give back the dough, ya see,
Since ole Still kiboshed the spree.
This story, now, it's getting old,
And it's brought us all pretty far.
And instead of standing here in the cold,
We should all go back to the bar.
Only sixty-four posts stand ahead in line
A small enough price to pay,
And we'll see the dawn rise above our Mom
At the peak of the next of Kay!!