Get this, ya buncha bozos. NO ONE can compete with Chongo Chimp. NO ONE. I am cruisin' straight to the Oval Office in 2012 and things are gonna change bigtime! Yessiree. You are gonna see history made when I put banana trees on the White House lawn and a tree house out back that even Tarzan would die for! There'll be coconuts too. Lots of 'em. No to mention mangos. Millions of mangos. There'll be grapevines hangin' in the rotunda. There'll be an ape in every cabinet post and a monkey behind every desk. Pigs will fly and hell will freeze over. Salesmen will sell ice to Eskimos and Madonna will publicly apologize for havin' been a bit too suggestive here and there over the years. Lady Gaga will apologize too and stop wearin' those ridiculous stage costumes! The troops will come home. (Except for Nigeria. Nigeria is gonna burn!) BillD will finally shut up and admit he's been WRONG about just about EVERYTHING and Don Firth will swear off politics forever and join the Trappist Monks.

Wait for it!

- Chongo