"Horror Movie"

As the horror movie was about to reach its
terrifying conclusion, the young woman
began fidgeting in her seat next to her date.

The man sitting behind her leaned forward
and inquired,

"Excuse me. Are you feeling hysterical?"

"No," she whispered. "He's feeling mine."

------------

"Spring Romance"

When I was a 20-something college student, I
became quite friendly with my study partner, a
64-year-old man, who had returned to school
to finish his degree. He confessed he had once
thought more than friendship might be a possibility.

"So what changed your mind?" I asked him.

"I went to my doctor and asked if he thought a
40-year age difference between a man and woman
was insurmountable. He looked at my chart and
said, 'You're interested in someone who's 104?'"