used to recite this one years ago - in a Norr-vee-ghan accent (of course)...

Yim Yohnson ship' from lumber yard
on board the scow "Sem Petch".
He didn't know his starboard bow
from off de forward hatch.

But Yim, he put on great-big bluff
Da' he bin sailor-man
until de troubles hit de scow
and Yim ha' to show his hand.

Now, the scow bin in the cord-vood trade,
and she sailed from sister's Bay
And Yim he was a handy man
'til off Twin Points, one day.

Ven yust like *finger-snap*
a sqvall on de vood scow flew.
Und made her stan' on her beam-end
und call up all de crew.

De Cap'n svore like crazy-man
un'a' Yim Yohnson yell.
"YUMP UP UN' RIFF DAT TOPS'L QVICK
OR SHE'S GOIN' TO BLOW TO HELL!"

But Yim, he yust say, "I'll not STIR
from dis cahooten stanchion,
dere bin ten tousand tops'ls, ya,
but only ONE Yim Yohnson!"

Und dat's how Yim,he loose his yob
und go no more to sea.
At sailin' he bin greenhorn, sure
und alvays vant to be,

De Cap'n kick him of de ship
und at Yim Yohnson svore
But he sadi, "I'd radder land DIS vay
den to float along de shore.

From the singing of "Privateer"
Apologies to anyone offended by the bad accent - but that's the way I learned it - consider this a historic document.
-Oldsod-