I wanna thank Ted Nugent. Why? Well, fer this reason: He makes every APP candidate and campaign worker look like a friggin' genius in comparison! Even the gorillas, includin' the really violent ones that eat their beer cans for entertainment after drinkin' the beer. I am sooooo glad he is with the Republicans, and not with us, cos it makes us look sooooo good! Ook! Ook! Yessir, this Ted Nugent character may just be the longlost missin' link. Not the one that connects human beings upward to apes and monkeys. No, not that one. The one that connects human beings downwards to garden slugs. LOL! I LOVE it that this whackjob is workin' for one of the 2 big parties! Go get 'em, Ted. Say some more really dumb things. Don't hold back, okay?
Now if only Obama would say a few things as dumb or even dumber as what Ted Nugent is sayin'. If only. That would guarantee an APP victory in November. Maybe a clean sweep. Obama has just gotta lose his mind between now and then for us to clinch the win.
I am prayin' for it. To Kong, of course. I got my fingers crossed. Maybe if Obama was to listen to a whole lot of old heavy metal music, that would do it. That stuff kills brain cells. I'm gonna send him some as a campaign contribution. I'm gonna send him the greatest hits of Ozzie Osbourne, Poison, Megadeath, Black Sabbath, Iron Maiden, Motorhead, and finally the piece de resistance: Ted Nugent. I hope this plan works real good by November.
- Chongo
p.s. The NRA imagines that their agenda is basically about the constitutional right of self-defence and the right to bear arms, as it was originally written in the Constitution. And they are dead serious about that. As for huntin', that would be a way secondary issue in their minds, so of course it's not primarily about huntin'. And, yeah, they DO think they speak for ALL gun owners, and obviously they don't....just like Obama and Romney think they speak for ALL Americans...and obviously, they don't. It is the conceit of all kinds of people in politics to think they speak for all kinds of people they don't speak for. For instance, I useta think I spoke for all Italian barbers! I was naive. There are Italian barbers out there who wouldn't vote fer me if I slipped them $1000 bucks on the sly and promised to move the Leanin' Tower of Pisa to Washington Square and make lasagna the national dish of America. Some of them hate me, in fact! This has taught me humility. I now know that I DON'T speak for all Italian barbers, and probably not even for all Polish grocers or Greek restaurant owners or Irish pimps. And I can take it, cos I don't need their damn votes to win if they don't like me! I'm gonna do it without 'em!
This is somethin' most other candidates don't have the guts to say. They try to suck up to everyone and pretend they speak for all kinds of people who in truth most likely can't stand 'em. Not this ape. NO sir. I know who my enemies are, and I ain't scared of 'em, and I ain't gonna pretend like I'm their good buddy just to scrounge up a vote or two. If I can't win by puttin' ALL my cards on the table, and makin' my real intentions plain, then I don't want the friggin' job!