ALFABET SONG
by Barry Louis Polisar


A is for armpit, acne and alchemy,
Au naturel and alcohol, albatross and atrophy,
Athlete's foot and anchovy, asthma, and autopsy
B is for bombshell, bacteria, and me.
B is for bombshell, bacteria, and me.

C is for cantankerous, canker sore, and candy,
D is for dumbbell, doody balls and dandy,
E is for egghead, enema and ear wax,
F is for follicle, fatty cell, and fax.
F is for follicle, fatty cell, and fax.

G is for grotesque, gross, and glockenspiel
H is for hernia, hemorrhoids (I hope they heal).
I is for imbecile, interface, and Illinois
J is for jugular vein, jaundice, and joy
J is for jugular vein, jaundice, and joy

K is for kickback, karma, and killer bee
L is for lint ball, lymph node, and larceny.
M is for mayonnaise, mayhem, and misogynist,
N is for nonsense, nudity, and nit.
N is for nonsense, nudity, and nit.

O is for oatmeal, Oreos, and oleo,
P is for politics, Pat and Edgar Allen Poe,
Q is for quadruple and R is for rude,
S is for S-hook and T is for two.
S is for S-hook and T is for two.

U is for undulate and V is for villainy,
W is too hard and so is X, Y and Z.