Ah, well - barn dances at weddings; it's pretty much gauranteed that not everyone is up for it, that you've been chosen as a lowest common denominator most likely to entertain most of the people (most of the time). If you can do that to the satisfaction of whoever's paying you, it's a success..

A culturally mixed wedding, he Irish, she Indian: they were a lovely couple, and made sure we knew they were happy with what we were doing. The groom's cousins, however, obviously didn't take to the concept of called dances, and came over to have a word. "You've got to stop telling them to get up and dance - if they want to dance they will."

We play them a tune while we're thinking about this.. then the groom is back. "Carry on as you were", he said, "that's exactly what we want!" I start calling for dancers for the next dance, and the cousins start heading for the band, rolling up their sleeves.

Fortunately for us, the groom headed them off; but they had their revenge. From the local streets a.. let's say a gentleman of the road was found: ah, but he was Irish. "He's going to sing us some songs." If I say what I thought of his performance it would come across as sour grapes: the truth is that everybody made sure they were upwind of him. The bride's family looked bemused - but the band had been shown our place.