There was a radio programme in the UK called "Does he take sugar?", which covered disability matters. It was called that because of the propensity of thoughtless folks to ask the person pushing the wheelchair, what the person in the wheelchair, likes or wants. As if they had no mind of their own, or couldn't answer for themselves!
I'm afraid it's a common problem, and my only comment in this instance is this. If these people are regular carers for people with disabilities, then either they're poorly trained, or they're not following guidelines.
Either way, they want a kick up the arse!