As Don Firth said, "Negro" or "black" used to be a perfectly respectable—and respectful—words." If you don't know, Songwronger (I DO hope you are a musician; otherwise I don't have much hope for you), I think you are probably too young to know what the aitch you are talking about. About most things, probably. At least, that is how you come across.

Speaking of the correct way(s) to speak, perhaps you don't know that "black" people nowadays tend to prefer the word to be capitalized, and they feel the same about White people. Just sayin'.

In my own experience I grew up in then-lily-white rural Oregon. I don't actually remember but I suspect that we/I said "nigger". (We also said "fillum" for film and "Colyum" for column, so let's face it, we were not the most sophisticated folks around.

When my family was planning to move to Virginia a girl asked me whether I knew what to call Negroes. I said, uncertainly, "Darkies?" She said, very seriously, No, you have to say "colored". That's what they want to be called.

So, you see, things - and terminologies - change. There is no way I would use or even think of using hurtful names unless I meant to hurt. At this point, I am willing to make an exception in your case, and to consider not worrying about hurting your feelings.