The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #27347   Message #340243
Posted By: Sorcha
14-Nov-00 - 12:00 AM
Thread Name: BS: Abortion: Here we go PART 2
Subject: RE: BS: Abortion: Here we go PART 2
Whee-ooooh. OK, I've been off line for almost 2 weeks, and I admit I did not read all of the first thread......kimmers, you are right on and all right. You have said everything I possibly could have said and much more coherently.........that said.........

I had one. My oldest child would now be 24, almost 25. S/He would have been born somewhere near my wedding day. I was young and stupid and somehow into "Charity Sex"......he was recently divorced and hurting. I was needy. I was so young and stupid that I did not realize what a manipulator he was......but his ex wife did. That was why she divorced him.

Yes, it was a very difficult decision--I miss the child that would have been,but I thank all the Gods that I am not beholden to its father. In my belief system, the child will get or has gotten another chance at life. At that time, I was not capable of being a mother, and would not have been a good one. It was only after 5 years of marriage that I felt I could mother a child adequetly.......

In exchange, I feel that I carried and birthed the daughter that was destined for my sister and she is the joy of my life. I can only hope that my child somehow, somewhere, recieved the mother s/he needed.

I do not, can not, and will not advocate abortiton as a means of birth control, but it MUST be legally available to all women in times of need. As kimmer says, if it is not available legally, it will still exist illegally. To our detriment. There is always tansy and pennyroyal. Not to mention knitting needles............

Only now, after both my parents are gone do I feel free to say this. My husband knows, and has always known about this dark secret, and his mother worked at the hospital where the procedure was done. She may know, she may not, but she has never tried to hurt me with it or throw it in my face.

I do pray for this child's soul nearly every day of my life---the stupids that I did are certainly not his fault, and I cry every year on our wedding anniversary.

Do not feel pity or sorrow for me, my friends, I have long since learned to live with this. This is not a "brave" posting, just an honest one.

What would I do if my daughter told me she was pregnant at 15? I do not know, my friends, I do not know. I only know that she is not ready to raise a child, and I cannot raise another one. And, spaw/Karen--all honor and respect to you, but adoption is very definitely not an easy option, for either the child or the adoptive parents. What do you tell an adopted child when he is old enough to know the truth? Your Mom didn't want you? Want is quite often not enough............