You intrigue me geof. Does Emma actually exist. Or is she a nom de plume? Perhaps a fat bloke called Oswin, who wishes he was Emma Peel, but is hopelessly fixated by Hartley's jam.

My cousin was taught by a teaching brother called Brother Oswin. The kids used to call him Ozzy. A bit like Jimmy Clitheroe's best friend in The Clitheroe Kid.