FINALLY! A RESOLUTION:
* BREAKING NEWS *
Candidates Negotiate Unprecedented Powersharing Agreement. Both to share White House: One as President, one as First Lady!
Voters must decide: Who will make a sexier First Lady?
Cast your vote here for First Lady 2000:
Full Story
The presidential candidates came together in the early hours this morning to settle the disputed election results 'Mano a Mano'.
The two men negotiated for the better part of one half hour, though reputable sources peeking through the window claim that they did spend about 10 minutes applying Noxema to the gigantic boil on Bush's cheek. After a quick review of "Cliff's Notes: The American Constitution" and a brief arm-wrestle, the candidates finalized an unprecedented 'powersharing' agreement, in which both will take office in the White House.
There will be a worldwide re-vote to determine who will be President and who will act as First Lady. Both candidates agreed that having a male First Lady this term will significantly reduce public confusion when Bill Clinton assumes that role in 2004.
Voters must decide: Who will make a sexier First Lady?
The re-vote has already begun in some places, and black-market exit poll data from the American territory of Guam shows the Vice President with a very narrow lead over Governor Bush, though this may be due to the false rumors circulating in Guam that Bush won the arm-wrestle.
We encourage you to fulfill your civic duty in this historic election year, and visit the FirstLady2000.com polling station:
*Click here to view shocking photos and cast your vote: