I just noticed the lyrics posted by GUEST,999 back on 13 Sep 12. What a mess! Here are the same lyrics with the scannos corrected. The original was a mimeographed booklet where the e's looked like o's, and so on.


THE LAVATORY MAN

Last Monday morning the Missus said, "Now Bob,
Go down to a steamship and got yourself a job."
So being a man of action, I hopped on board a tram,
And twenty minutes later I was a lavatory man.

Now my girl Flo, she thinks the world of me,
But she doesn't know I work in a ladies' lavatory.
She comes down to meet me, dressed in lovely clothes,
But where the hell she gets them, God only knows.

Her hats are black and blue and her shoes are black and tan,
And I know she doesn't get them from the lavatory man.

One day upon the gangway from my duties I'm relieved,
When looking on the wharf a lovely lady I perceived,
A lovely looking lady, full of grace and charm.
She had a lot of luggage and a baby on her arm.

I raced down that gangway, just like a knight of old,
And grabbed the infant from her arms. It was just 3 weeks old.
It left a brown and yellow stain on my uniform spic and span.
The bastard must have known I was the lavatory man.


[This is a strange song; it doesn't seem to tell a complete story. I'd bet something is missing.—JD]