The degree of peeving has risen. after breakfast, I set off for the ferry, where I found a notice announcing only one boat running and an hour wait. This was, mercifully, untrue. Though I did have to wait while a stream of traffic from a road invisible from my approach route took the ferry before mine.

On the other side of the river, I followed my satnav instructions along a route I had scouted in Google maps street view to the depot. On my virtual recce, I had spotted that the entrance was gated, so had made a second phone call to find out the procedure, of driving up to the security cabin and asking, which I followed.

It turned out that the driver had not filled in the consignment number, and when told my address, I was informed that the Barking depot did not deliver to my postcode, despite my card being from that depot, with a Barking code number on it. The office started phoning around.

So, my parcel was in Basildon, 17 miles away, down the Southend road and well past the tolled Dartford crossing.

Off I went. The A13 is not a romantic road for songs to be sung about. I'm glad I got a satnav - I wouldn't have had time to do the finding the odd corner of a trading estate by map, since I didn't have one that would show that, and the map on my phone doesn't talk.

The Basildon depot had a different procedure, in which I should not drive up to the security guy. I should go to reception. He flet it would be a good idea to check up first, as he was a glass half empty sort of chap, and had his doubts about my parcel being on the premises. Reception did not answer the phone. I went round to them, got let in, and eventually the parcel arrived. The guy helped me load it, and apologised for my being left the Barking card, explaining that they are now asking the drivers to check that they have the correct ones before setting off.

I made it back across the river (the Thames estuary for those not over here) in time for the swimming lesson I go to with the school.

But what a way to run a business. It is clear that people collecting is a regular occurrence. I wonder how many have done so because of missed rings. (There is a lot of stuff on the net about the company Yodel and their use of such techniques - one in which a guy was seen writing out the card before approaching the door, for instance.)

I can believe Pete would have done his level best to deliver, and I know some do their best to find neighbours, but if it can't be done in the time allotted, there is something wrong with the business plan - isn't Murdoch involved with TNT?

Penny