Just to remind you that there will be a recital this afternoon in the village hall by Mr Cedric Blunt, the president of the English Parlour Folk Song and Tea Dance Society, who will be treating us to a genteel selection of edifying English Tradition songs collected from assorted sruffs, miscreants and ragmuffins and by means of sophistiticated arrangements on the pianoforte suitably scrubbed up to reveal their hidden depths and qualities.

Our regular members will be assured to know that whilst Mr Blunt collected his songs from the low life scum of the outlying estates and more impoverished regions of our village & its environs (including many tinkers, travellers, gypsy's, vagrants, and migrant farm workers) none of these people will actually be in attendance at the recital as we feel it would be detrimental to both their purity and dignity to be exposed to more genteel society.

There will be tea, cakes, buns, toffee and smelling salts available throughout the afternoon, especially as several of Mr Blunt's songs are described as being exciting portrayals of Authentic Country Life (such as The Fox Jumped Over the Parson's Peascod Patch and The Bonny Black Innocent Hare) whilst others are said to be betray their 'rather risque' origins. Songs such as Eh, Our Lucy's a One (in which a mother interrogates her naughty son over the whereabouts of his little sister's teddy bear) are described by Mr Blunt as being in all probability, deeply metaphorical in nature, likewise The Seeds of Lovely Nancy, whereas as others, such as How the Clever Parson Outwits the Stupid Fisherman and Pleasures His Fat Ugly Wife With a Cunning Cromer Crabfish Lubricated with Butter and Cheese and All, he confesses to being quite unnecessarily over-explicit.

As usual, there will be Country Dancing afterwards to the accompaniment of the Misses Tabatha and Melissa Tinkersmeadow on their delightful fiddles and after all that gay excitement, the afternoon will be rounded off by a recital of Scotch Ballads sung by the exquisite Miss Clarissa Tinkersmeadow accompanied by the ever popular Master Tom Tinkersmeadow on his Ondes Martenot.