Maybe this might cheer a bit, tho I can't see that it would under such dire straights.
Anyway...
I heard they found about 200 dead crows near Moncton, and there was concern they may have died from Avian Flu.
They had a Bird Pathologist examine the remains of all the crows, and he confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu, to everyone's relief. However, he determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, and only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.
The Province then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine the disproportionate percentages for truck versus car kill.
The Ornithological Behaviorist determined the cause in short order. When crows eat road kill, they always set-up a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. His conclusion was that the lookout crow could say "Caw" but he could not say "Truck."