Oh Johnny Lebeck how could you be so mean
I told you you'd be sorry for inventing that machine
Now all the neighbors' cats and dogs will nevermore be seen
They'll all be grounded sausage meat in Johnny Lebeck's machine

One day the thing stopped working, the damn thing wouldn't go
Johnny Lebeck he climbed inside to see what made it so
His wife was out walking about the house in her sleep
She gave the crank a heck of a yank and Johnny Lebeck was meat


          **This is the song, as it was song to me in my childhood by my father in New Hampshire