I suppose a number of us have an occupation that takes up much of our time: eldercare. My mother-in-law will be 98 this month, and lately it has become quite a burden to take care of her. My wife is a chiropractor, and she's able to give her mother a level of care that wouldn't be available in a nursing home, so I'm glad we're doing it.

It does have some drawbacks, however. The thing that scares me most is moving my mother-in-law from her bed to a wheelchair or commode, and then to a chair or sofa. She injured her back at Christmas, and not she's not able to help us move her. We tried a belt around her waist to help in lifting, but it hurts her. We have a physical therapist coming a couple of days a week - I'm hoping the PT can help us figure out a way to move my mother-in-law safely.

This afternoon, my wife Christina was out walking the dog and my mother-in-law was trying to say something about a kettle next to the television. I brought her several kettles to see if that's what she meant, but we couldn't figure it out. When my wife came home, she said her mom confuses the kettle with the microwave, which looks like a television to her; and what she wanted were the brownies that we keep on top of the microwave. So, Christina brought her a brownie, and she was happy.

I'm gone a lot of the time, doing music and volunteer work and whatnot. That leaves the burden of care to Christina, which makes me feel guilty at times. Even when I'm home, it feels like there's not much I can do. We have caregivers come in two or three days a week to give Christina a break, but it's tough - especially for her.

So, that's our life. How's it with you other caregivers? Any tips to share?

-Joe-