It didn't go down well with everyone but some years ago, Blitherscrum staged a midnight recital by the massed Pipes and Drums of the Camel Corps of the 14th Inverury and Cillgarraiochmacochory Highlanders and Lowlanders Knobbly Kneesers Regiment.

Personally, I never understood what the problem was, or why they've never been invited back. The band was perfectly audible several miles away for anyone who wanted to listen. What's more that alcove they played in, right between the tents and the rows of houses on the field perimeter, made the perfect natural amphitheatre. In fact it couldn't have been better.

Come on lads. Say ballocks to begrudgers and get them back this year.