This is one of the earliest versions I know , I think it came from the West Country ( Devon , Cornwall.) I first heard it in the early sixties and used to sing it to a tune similar to "Dear Old Donegal". For the Americans; pittle pot is chamber pot, braces are suspenders, bum is arse, and twelve bore is shotgun.

SEVEN DRUNKEN NIGHTS

As I came home on a Monday a little afore my time
There in the shed were a bike that wern't mine
Who's bike be that, who's bike be that who's ever banden be
It only be a milkin' cow my mother has sent to me
Well it's many the miles I've traveled a thousand miles or more
But a milkin' cow with handlebars I never did see before

As I came home on a Tuesday a little afore my time
There on the hat stand were a hat that wern't mine
Who's hat be that, who's hat be that who's ever banden be
That only be a pittle pot my mother has sent to me
Well it's many the miles I've traveled a thousand miles or more
But a pittle pot with a curley brim I never did see before

As I came home on a Wednesday a little afore my time
Hanging on the bed post were some pants that wern't mine
Who's pants be they who's pants be they who's ever banden be
It's only a pair of bloomers that my mother has sent to me
Well it's many the miles I've traveled a thousand miles or more
But braces on bloomers I never did see before

As I came home on a Thursday a little afore my time
There on the pillow were an head that wern't mine
Who's head be that, who's head be that, who's ever banden be
That only is a baby's head what you have given to me
Well it's many the miles I've traveled a thousand miles or more
But a baby's head with whiskers on I never did see before

As I came home on a Friday a little afore my time
There in the bed were a bum that wern't mine
Who's bum be that ,who's bum be that, who's ever banden be
That only be a pumpkin that my mother has sent to me
Well it's many the miles I've traveled a thousand miles or more
But a pumpkin with pimples on I never did see before

As I came home on a Saturday a little afore my time
There in my wife's hand were a thing that wern't mine
Oh what be that, Oh what be that, whatever banden be
That only is a rolling pin my mother has sent to me
Well it's many the miles I've traveled a thousand miles or more
But a rolling pin with wall nuts on I never did see before

As I came home on a Sunday a little afore my time
I went straight into the shed my old twelve bore to find
Oh what be that , Oh what be that , That frightened couple asked
It's only my twelve bore shotgun, going to stick it right up your arse
Now it's many the miles I've traveled a thousand miles or more
But I never saw two buggers run quite as fast before

Cheers Bill