There is a story (refuted by Catholic apologists) that Mother Theresa withheld pain killers in her death houses as a matter of course. One woman, crying out in agonising pain, begged for painkillers, but was rebuffed and told that her pain was 'Jesus kissing her' for sharing the agonies of his passion. The woman cried out: 'Then please - tell Jesus to stop kissing me!'

Interesting therefore that this same bon mot was deemed to be a worthy bit as part of Mother Theresa's stand-up routine, where she delivers 'Tell Jesus to please stop kissing me' as the pay-off and has the audience rolling in the aisles. Here's a wee film of one such performance:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IkIyQyrfQS4