Some thoughts I once saved from a website on good and effective communications. I post it for consideration only:

""Are you Irenic?
Being irenic in communications means to approach people peacefully. It is the opposite of being quarrelsome. It is admirable when individuals are passionate about their discussion but, ironically, these passions can often make a person so militant and hostile no one else wants to listen to him speak! A good communicator always keeps his cool. He does not let the polemics of others cause him to sacrifice his level-headed calmness. When correction is necessary, tact is defined by gentleness.

Are you honest?
For the communicator this includes the willingness to admit it, when they don't know things. The mark of a good communicators influence is not simply in how much he (or she) knows, but how much he realizes he doesn't know. The good communicator's job is not to have an answer for every question, but to be able to handle questions in an honest way, since he may have wrestled with the issue himself.You don't know that much. You are not that smart. You will never be an expert in every area

Are you adaptabile?
Are you willing to change your position? What if the evidence was not on your side? Are you led purely by your emotional convictions? If you cannot change, what gives you the right to require it of others? Good communicators are always adapting because they know they don't have it all figured out.

Are you transparent?
Good communicators open themselves to others, warts and all. Poor communicators present themselves on a pedestal, polished and clean. Giving off that image is a barrier to good and productivecommunications?

Are you polite? No need to go into this in detail , your parents likely defined it for you way back. Have you wandered from their good advice?""