I well understand the stresses of being a caregiver -- even though in my case, the situation doesn't involve Alzheimer's or dementia. (For which I TRULY thank God!)

I've been taking a free 6-week course "Powerful Tools for Caregivers" sponsored by NH ServiceLink, which is an aging and disability resource center and RiverWoods. Basically the course deals with helping the caregiver take care of themselves so they can continue caring for the care receiver. There are really good chapters in the course book (and covered in class) on communication and on dealing with emotions -- both especially useful in dementia cases.

Here is the website - Powerful Tools For Caregivers

I think you'll have to check with local elder support agencies to find where you can take the class.

About half of the caregivers in the class I'm taking are dealing with dementia which has a whole different level of problems from those of us just coping with physical disabilities. But I've learned a bit from the experiences of those in the class. And the major thing is to learn to let go. It doesn't do anybody any good to get angry, frustrated or just plain sick of answering the same question over and over. They're not doing it to spite you. If you get upset you're just hurting yourself and the added stress can literally make you sick. And the care receiver won't remember that you're upset, they're upset, or what you just told them. So just let it go.

I highly recommend the class. And after this week's class (the last) and I finish reading the book and photocopying pages of resources, etc., I'm sending the book to my sister who is caregiver to my mother (in a distant city from me) and who needs the information desperately.

Linn