Daddy, if I can call you that, I knew you would turn up again one day. Mummy says the incident in Marrakesh with the goat was probably a misunderstanding, and what you do with the couscous is entirely your own business.

She sold the lyrics of your song to a bearded man who sweet talked her one night in the Lion Tavern who must have been that impostor and charlatan, Matthew Edwards. She even told him that she was born in the NHS and he went and pinched that line from her. She desperately needed the money however to keep us all in food and clothing.

Have you seen that the first LPs of the Lovebites are now selling on eBay for over £1500? Well, Mummy has got some of the tapes from the Eel Pie Island sessions when you were still in the band. She thinks they could fetch quite a lot of money and is willing to share it with you. You can get in touch with her via her Nigerian bank account.

Little George